Home Again

It's always nice to be home again, but I am very sad to leave our Ohio family. We hadn't been there since the summer of 2009 when I was pregnant, and we got to see tons of family and friends during that visit. But it felt like we were just there. Conversations that I've been having with these people for the past 18 years continued right where they left off. Hugs and more hugs greeted us with each visitor. And, of course, Lexi was adored. And this time, unlike last time, I got to eat! Jon's mom Alyce is a wonderful cook, and she can't just have one dessert in the house. Yum!


I say I am sad to be home because I miss them. I always miss them, even though I may not show it. I think about our Ohio family all the time. Alyce does a great job keeping us updated on happenings, and Facebook helps too, but there is nothing like a hug. I think my journey with anxiety leads me to cling to things even harder, and I admit that clinging to family is logical to me. I think I have a type of separation anxiety that makes me very sad after a visit, any visit, because I don't know when it will happen again. We don't know when we will visit next. I think now that we have Lexi, it would be important to visit more often, but it will also be more expensive, and more of a travel challenge (more on that later.) There are phones, Facebook, and the good ole mail to help us though. For that I am thankful.


As for Lexi and flying, there have been times in the recent past that I didn't take Lexi for a walk around our own neighborhood because something in me thought it would be too much of a hassle. My fears about the trip to Ohio mounted. But that little girl did better than I ever imagined. She slept during takeoff, played with her toes, shared her crackers with the flight attendants, uh oh 'd a lot of stuff to send mommy and daddy scrambling. The highlight of the trip was our 5 hour layover on the way there in Minneapolis where she walked behind the stroller knowing she was hot stuff. The look on her face was like 'that's right, I am walking now!' It was so precious!



The trip home involved ear pain and a lot of crying, but once we figured out that giving Lexi bottled water to sip really helped, it got a little better. Lexi got to spend time with her cousins and aunts and uncles, and her doting grandparents. We really had an awesome trip. I got to bond with Alyce over parenting ideas (Love you!). I got to see grandpa Cloyce and Lexi make faces at each other with so much love exchanged. We got to see Jon's brother's and sisters and catch up a bit. And I got to relax, which was truly needed.


We also had family Thanksgiving on Sunday, and our sister Denene surprised us with a cake for Lexi's Birthday. WOW this cake was amazing. It was carousel horses, which is what I want to do for her bedroom when she's a bit older. We were surpised, and Lexi loved the cake with her whole hands and face.



Sometimes I hide at home in the intent to not do the difficult task of taking Lexi places, but I think I need to change my world view on that. Lexi loves being out. If she isn't happy, she'll let me know, and we can always go home again. -Jenni